realisation 

I've seeked them out.

With my sex.

With my surface.

The landscape of my lust.

Not my love.

Not my soul.

Not my spirit.

Not my worth.

They've all fallen.

And I've been emptied.

Emptied of my desire.

Emptied of my hope.

Emptied of my love.

Emptied of my worth.

I did this.

To my self.

To my soul.

Broke my spirit.

Broke my own heart.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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THIS ALLOYED DECEIT

DARK NIGHTS OF MY HEART
DRAW IN, BREATHE LIFE
IM DROWNING IN YOUR MIST
YOUR SHADOW

CALLING NAMES OF LOVE
IM FALLING INTO THIS MUD
OF MY DENIAL

ALWAYS HOPING
ALWAYS DREAMING
ALWAYS ALONE

SUNLIGHT OF MY SOUL
EXPOSING, LET GO
IM ALIGHT IN MY TRUTH
MY SOLITUDE

CALLING NAMES OF LOVE
IM FALLING INTO THIS DUST
THIS ALLOYED DECEIT, CALLED LOVE

NK 14/9/17

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darkness consumes

it pulls me down
again
influenced by existence
canalised by my past
this darkness consumes
my present, everyday
i breathe, it breathes
with me
i awe at its depth
awaken to a different beat

sometimes, i let her 
take me
for hours i grieve in
this despair
a place that is secondary
it is from this nature
i emerge
renewed.

nk. 17/6/17